SaaS Masterclass: 3 Top SaaS Thought Leaders & Their Best Blog Posts
2024 is the year the O’Daily gets SaaSy. Here a 3 great SaaS thought leaders with 3 of the top articles from each.
Read More
2024 is the year the O’Daily gets SaaSy. Here a 3 great SaaS thought leaders with 3 of the top articles from each.
Read MoreI made a terrible mistake last year.
Ironically (or idiotically?), I rarely posted about B2B SaaS.
Even though I have 15+ years of experience scaling B2B SaaS companies.
I made the classic startup mistake where you forget — or don’t realize — how much you learn along the way!
Well, folks, this egregious oversight ends today.
2024 is the year the O’Daily gets SaaSy.
(Not to be confused with “sassy” which we’ve been for years. 😂 💃)
Starting with some of my favorite SaaS thought leaders and the content we referenced most often from the trenches!
Here a 3 great SaaS thought leaders with 3 of the top articles from each.
What started as an awesome blog by Jason Lemkin, founder of EchoSign, is now a world-wide sen-SaaS-tion!
The 48 Types of VP Sales. Make Deadly Sure You Hire the Right One.
Evangelist - Make It Repeatable - Go Big - Dashboards chart is legendary.
Unending list of urgent priorities but no resources to address them? Correct! 🙃 But it does get better! (Circulated frequently at early Pardot 😂)
Customer Success Is A Single Digit Hire - I may be biased (just a few articles on Customer Success on the O’Daily)…but Jason lays out the financials and experiences to back me up!
#PROTIP
The SaaStr Annual conference is excellent! I attended and loved it. Relevant, actionable content and tons of SaaS founders, leaders, and investors who “get” it.
Ex-Paypal, founder of Yammer (acquired by Microsoft) who started Craft Ventures that invests exclusively in B2B SaaS. He’s a no-BS, numbers-oriented dude who has seen a tons and knows the playbook (and pitfalls!).
Simple Math To Set Up A Sales Team - base salaries, quotas, commission, CAC
The Dark Side of Sales - 10 potential pitfalls of fast growing sales teams
Key SaaS Metrics - what they are, how to calculate them
#PROTIP
Hear David Sacks’ current insights on SaaS, tech, and business every week on the All-In Podcast which is one of my favorite podcasts and a great way to understand how VCs think!
DISCLAIMER: I was part of two successful SaaS companies that David founded and invested in. Oh, and he founded Atlanta Ventures where I’m a partner now!
He’s written over 3000 (!!??🤯) blog posts on entrepreneurship and built multiple successful SaaS companies, so yeah, he’s a great resource!
12 Ideas To Strengthen Culture - culture is the only sustainable advantage a founder has complete control over. No one is better on practical, actionable strategies for this than David.
4 Reasons for Startups to Avoid Big Partnerships - not talked about as much as it should be; check out the “related articles” for more tips on this.
5 Controllable Factors In The Pardot Success Story - applicable to your SaaS company too!
#PROTIP
One of the best behind-the-scenes look at the early years of a now-multi-billion dollar SaaS company with David and Kyle Porter talking shop (as yours truly moderates).
What are some of your favorite SaaS articles or thought leaders? What resources do you reference frequently?
Happy Fundraise Kickoff! Here’s 4 ways to align your company and positioning so a VC can easily say yes.
Read MoreHappy New Year Fundraise Kickoff!
Holidays are over which means…
Investors are back in the saddle, ready to kick ass and write checks!
(ICYMI - Winter break and summer are notoriously slow in fundraising land.)
If you’re a founder getting ready to raise — especially if you’re new to the world of venture capital — here’s what is often misunderstood:
VCs have bosses.
They have to show returns on the money they invest.
Money that belongs to someone else.
Money that comes from:
Non-profits
Hospitals
Pension funds
Higher ed institutions
Family offices
These institutions are expecting financial returns so they can support things like sick kids, scientific research, workers in retirement, and the next generation of thinkers and leaders.
So even if you’re talking to the founding partner of a firm — who seems like a successful, high roller — they are answerable to their “bosses”, they’ve set certain expectations about what and how they’ll invest, and they feel tremendous responsibility to generate returns.
Why does this matter????
It’s important to understand so you can position your business accordingly!
Many VCs care deeply about the world, helping others, doing good.
But they can’t say yes to your company if the likelihood of a large return is not there.
So…make it easy for them to say yes!!!
Here’s 4 ways to align your company and positioning so a VC can easily say “Yes To The Dress Invest!”
Big market = big returns. An amazing founder or idea in a small market can never deliver big returns. (Which I talk about in detail here and here!)
So even if a VC loves you, if the market is too small, they will pass.
Related — make sure you clearly and realistically explain your TAM SAM SOM. The more realistic the math, the more trust (and excitement) you build.
VCs can sniff out an exaggerated market quickly so don’t try to “check the box” on this.
The thing that hurts my heart the most?? A founder with traction and a great business model who doesn’t talk about it until the end of their pitch.
PLEASE — for the love — TALK ABOUT THE MONEY!
Do it early. Do it often. An investor’s (love) language is DOLLARS.
(See “VCs have to show returns” above. 😂)
No revenue yet? That’s okay! You can still use dollars and numbers to tell your story.
Venture firms can vary wildly based on:
Stage
Check size
Types of companies they invest in (software, hardware, consumer products)
Types of industries
What they look for in a founder
Business model (transaction fees, recurring subscription)
Being a “Strategic”
Even partners within the firm may focus on different things.
So make sure you know who you’re talking to and that you’re highlighting what matters to their firm. Save your best for last so you get lots of practice!
Firms will very occasionally make exceptions to their investment thesis or criteria. But it’s usually for someone they’ve known for a long time or a company with insane traction.
At the end of the day — especially in the early stages — investors are investing in YOU.
Your confidence, perseverance, creativity, intelligence, vision, ability to sell, and ambition to build a billion dollar company will attract others, including investors.
Confidence and belief are contagious — and vital for weathering the hard times that will inevitably come!
Yes, you need to be coachable and not a dickhead.
But the ability to inspire buy-in from employees, customers, and other investors is something that investors vet heavily.
Kevin Ryan has amazing examples and specific phrases about how this can look in “Step 2” of Step-by-Step Fundraising Tactics from the NYC Legend Who Raised $750M.
Not sure this is you?
The best, most successful CEOs weren’t sure either. They figured out ways to overcome their own doubts, including…
Fake it ‘til you make it!!!
You can also practice and be intentional to:
learn to sell (or improve and grow at anything)
There’s compelling research that the most well-funded founders (regardless of gender) know how to redirect the conversation to talk about the vision and upside.
It’s a strategy that comes across as “confidence” but is actually something that can be cultivated and practiced!
Fundraising is a full-effort process that can take 100+ meetings to get the desired results.
Understanding what matters to VCs and how to best position your business can speed things up.
Want more tips on fundraising or how to work with investors? Check out these resources and reply below with future topics you’d like me to cover!
What’s your best tip for fundraising?? What should founders and startups know before “going out to market”?
I don’t know who needs this but I’ve seen a few startups fail from founder burnout. I haven’t seen any startups fail because a founder took a couple of days off.
Read MoreI don’t know who needs this but I’ve seen a few startups fail from founder burnout. I haven’t seen any startups fail because a founder took a couple of days off.
I love this advice from Alex Friedman (which is technically TWO sentences, you fact-checking, math geniuses!).
Wrap up the year, close the deal, get through key emails…and then close your laptop.
It is harder to take time off.
It takes more discipline, confidence, and focus to NOT work than to default to grind mode.
The difference between the elite and amateurs in triathlon (or any high level sport)?
How they handle the off-days.
Someone who is taking their rest seriously? Feet on the couch? Massage? Naps? Clearly a pro.
Someone who is sneaking in extra miles or saying, “I just can’t take time off” like a humble brag? Amateur hour.
Trust the process. Trust yourself.
I know you can do it!
Have an amazing holiday, pour into your loved ones, and can’t wait to hear how hard you relaxed.
See y’all in 2024 ready to DESTROMINATE!!!!!!!
I don’t know who needs this but I’ve seen a few startups fail from founder burnout. I haven’t seen any startups fail because a founder took a couple of days off.
Read MoreI don’t know who needs this but I’ve seen a few startups fail from founder burnout. I haven’t seen any startups fail because a founder took a couple of days off.
I love this advice from Alex Friedman (which is technically TWO sentences, you fact-checking, math geniuses!).
Wrap up the year, close the deal, get through key emails…and then close your laptop.
It is harder to take time off.
It takes more discipline, confidence, and focus to NOT work than to default to grind mode.
The difference between the elite and amateurs in triathlon (or any high level sport)?
How they handle the off-days.
Someone who is taking their rest seriously? Feet on the couch? Massage? Naps? Clearly a pro.
Someone who is sneaking in extra miles or saying, “I just can’t take time off” like a humble brag? Amateur hour.
Trust the process. Trust yourself.
I know you can do it!
Have an amazing holiday, pour into your loved ones, and can’t wait to hear how hard you relaxed.
See y’all in 2024 ready to DESTROMINATE!!!!!!!
Yes, even the best CEOs and founders have self-doubt and worry — but they leverage these 4 truths to unleash their greatness!
Read MoreLast week, I let you in on the biggest secret (or most helpful insight???) in the entrepreneur biz.
EVERYONE HAS IMPOSTER SYNDROME.
But you’d never know.
Why?
Because the best founders and leaders have figured out how to:
And there’s more.
I’ve been behind-the-scenes with hundreds of talented, wildly successful entrepreneurs.
Here are the 4 patterns I’ve seen from the best of the best.
Yes, even the best have self-doubt and worry — but they leverage these 4 truths to unleash their greatness!
Most CEOs, founders or leaders can tell you what they’re good at (and what they’re not good at!).
It will sound like this:
They know that you don’t have to be great at everything. They are insecure about their weaknesses but leverage their strengths to the max:
EXPLORE: What are your strengths and how are you going to lean into them to build a big ass business??
Behind every great leader is…
That polished stage presence?
It may be a result of a $10k exec training and 100 hours of practice.
Many skills including things like “confidence” and “sales skills” can be cultivated and learned.
EXPLORE: How are you systematically improving? Are you using support and accountability to accelerate the process? Here’s more ideas, resources, and founder stories.
Think about your first pitch. Now think about your 50th pitch. Way better, right?
You have an important data point:
I used to suck but I practiced and now I’m much better. That means I can work on other things and get better too.
Every repetition builds on itself:
I am little more confident than last time because I’ve done this before. Because I’m more confident, I will do a little better and learn more new things that make me even better for next time.
What else have you done that you didn’t think you could?
What have you worked at?
What is easy now that took tons of effort at first?
How about…
Even if you’re early in your career, you have plenty of examples.
Whenever you feel insecure, use your life resume as a confidence boost!
EXPLORE: What is a hard thing that you’ve done? What seemed impossible when you started but you got better over time? Make a list for reference! Ask a friend or loved one if you need perspective.
It’s the cooler, more positive side of the Peter Principle.
Someone who is ambitious will always feel a little out of their league.
Why?
Because they’re pushing out of their comfort zone to grow.
The best people never want to be the smartest in the room.
It’s a recipe for personal stagnation.
But the inevitable result of intentionally not being the smartest?
You always feel not-quite-as-smart.
Self-inflicted insecurity in the pursuit of improvement and greatness!
If I want to feel fast, I can race a slow person.
If I want to be fast, I run with people faster than me and get my ass kicked daily.
And — of course — with the most hilarious life irony — the faster I get, the more I understand how slow I am!
When I am at top speed, running all out as hard as I can, it’s still 2 minutes per mile (aka 50%) slower than the fastest marathoner in the world. Yes, the best runners can run for 26.2 miles at a 4:30 minute per mile pace and my 30 second sprint might hit 6 minutes.
The better you get…the more you understand how far you have to go!
Running is an easy analogy but of course this applies to company building, technical knowledge, sales, parenting, investing, EVERYTHING!
You don’t feel insecure because you’re not good. You feel “insecure” because you want to continually improve and be challenged!
EXPLORE: How have you challenged yourself recently? What “room” did you enter knowing it would be hard but a great growth opportunity?
What are the most important insights you’ve learned about doubt, confidence, and success? What are great leaders doing that we can all learn from? Do you agree that the more you learn, the more you realize how much you don’t know?
Every founder, entrepreneur, CEO I know…at some point…when their guard is down…has shared insecurities.
Read MoreEvery founder, entrepreneur, CEO I know…at some point…when their guard is down…has alluded to the fact that they:
Don’t believe me?
Here’s a peak behind closed doors:
This is not false humility.
These are incredibly successful humans who have doubts about themselves and their accomplishments.
So what’s their secret?
How do they overcome insecurities?
Here’s the thing — they don’t overcome them.
They do it anyway.
They don’t let the fear or doubt stop them.
They do the thing —customer meeting, public speech, company launch, capital raise— with conviction and courage despite their insecurity.
They lean into their strengths, work on their weaknesses, and act with confidence even if they don’t always feel it.
Why do I share this?
If you feel insecure, it’s NOT a sign that you can’t, shouldn’t, or don’t belong.
It’s a sign that you have big ambitions and you match the profile of a typical CEO.
Everyone feels insecure, including amazing people that you respect and admire.
They are doing it anyway.
And so can you.
What would happen if you DID IT ANYWAY???
What’s more important — how your customer feels about you or what their usage tells you? It’s an age old question in customer experience. Here's the 4 quadrants and plan of attack for each!
Read MoreWhat’s more important — how your customer feels about you or what their usage tells you?
It’s an age old question in customer experience.
Here’s how I think about it:
You can then prioritize and personalize the outreach to each group.
Below, we break down the likely reasons for each type of score, the most effective action steps, and the risks for each bucket.
Understanding each situation will help you maximize time, impact, and results of customer success efforts!
**power users who love you**
These are your reference customers and Customer Advisory Board members.
They are the template for sales and marketing to identify the “Ideal Customer Profile.”
More of these please!
**Happy under-users**
They use one feature.
They’d be better off with a different tool.
You know they’re at risk but they keep telling you they’re fine!
**cry for help or too enterprise**
They’re not happy but usage is high.
Usually because they are stretching your tool to the limits.
They need enterprise features like advanced permission settings or multi-tenant management.
Or maybe they’re using your product in a hack-y way (e.g. a B2B tool for B2C company).
Or — best case — this is a cry for help. Remember, angry customers are a good sign!
They care enough to get frustrated and tell you about it.
I’ve seen low scores from:
**Very at-risk**
They’re not using and not getting value. Makes sense that their satisfaction is in the dumps.
But they did buy your product initially so someone somewhere thought it would be helpful.
Time to dig in!
In the wise words of a hilarious, long-time customer success manager:
You can bring a customer to water but you can’t make them drink.
And when they die of dehydration, they’ll blame you!
😂😂😂
Nothing like some snarky customer humor to remind you that — customer success is a two-way street. Even the best Customer Success Manager can’t save an unwilling customer.
In a perfect world, you attack all quadrants at the same time.
But startups do not have unlimited resources (what does, really?) so we must prioritize!
Obviously, use your best judgment based on your unique company, customers, data, and situation.
And there’s a huge caveat to — LOOK AT CUSTOMER CONTRACT AMOUNT!!! This framework assumes that customers are paying about the same or that you’re segmenting first based on customer spend.
So assuming you’re accounting for different customer spend…
While your happy, high-usage customers are the priority, it’s realistic to spend 80% of time on unhappy-but-there’s-potential customers, and 20% of time on keeping your best customers happy.
What do you think is more important — customer usage data or self-reported customer satisfaction data?
What strategies are most effective? Any surprising results or effective tactics with different types of customers?
COMING SOON: Which should you start tracking first — usage metrics or customer satisfaction???
If you’re short on time, money, or both (it’s a startup after all!), here are 5 easy and **FREE** ways to show your appreciation this week — and ANY week!
Read MoreHappy (American) Thanksgiving Week!
A great time for me to join the thousands (millions???) of people writing about gratitude.
We’ve shared holiday gift ideas for employees and customers (including free and remote friendly options) before.
Here are fresh, new, hot-from-the-Thanksgiving-oven ideas to show love to your team — whether “team” is employees, family, mentors, friends, or all of the above!
If you’re short on time, money, or both (it’s a startup after all!), here are 5 easy and **FREE** ways to show your appreciation this week — and ANY week!
For an employee, maybe it’s an intro to mentor or someone in a similar role at another startup. (Also a great way for male leaders to support women!)
For a fellow entrepreneur, a future client.
Investors love intros to founders. (too obvious?? 😜)
Make sure the intro is to someone you personally like and think is awesome!
Bonus points if the intro-ees have a shared interest outside of work.
I never don’t have a good conversation with a fellow running nerd. 🤓
No one ever said no to a thoughtful LinkedIn rec!
A sentence or two does the job.
Being proactive (before they ask you) with an employee, customer, or vendor is an incredible move.
Make sure it’s positive without hyperbole. It was SO awkward when I had to remove my glowing review of Sam Bankman-Fried. 😂😂😂
Even the shyest folks occasionally appreciate a big ole public shout out!
Do it via Slack, a team meeting, or the socials — whatever works with your style and company.
Tie it to a specific project or memorable moment.
Give details on how the person’s strengths or effort impacted the outcome.
The specifics are what make it engaging and special!
Nothing says, “I appreciate you” like putting someone’s head on a superhero body.
I’m not even joking!
One of my favorite Rigor moments was when Francis Cordón took a screenshot from a morning check-in and Billy Hoffman turned it into a Slack emoji called the “Kathrynator.”
(A lot of people wear sunglasses to meetings, right?)
THANK YOU, FRANCIS AND BILLY!!! Here is your public shout out!! (See Tip #3)
If you are good at video or use AdPipe, you can up the ante with a fun clip.
Just remember to make it an unequivocally-positive-meme not a possibly-passive-aggressive-snarky-meme!
Yes, saying thank you or what you appreciate directly to someone is great.
You know what’s even better?
Sharing something positive that was said about them when they weren’t in the room!
Because there’s no doubt that it was sincere.
And even the most confident folks wonder how they’re perceived.
We made this a “thing” at Rigor when we realized that we rarely gave direct compliments but often sung someone’s praises to others.
We started sharing “behind-the-back” compliments regularly and it was so well received that I continue to do it today.
Certain roles — especially CEOs and founders, but also support reps, engineers, anyone in leadership — hear lots of constructive feedback or grievances without much positive in the mix.
If you hear something good, share it!
What are your favorite simple, no-cost ways to show gratitude???
What is perceived as “confidence” can be learned and deliberately cultivated. Here are my favorite tips on how to project confidence — regardless of how you feel inside.
Read MoreLast week, we talked about how to communicate confidently as a peer, especially in a 1-on-1 or small group setting.
All those people that seem so confident? On stage, in meetings, at events, or beyond?
They probably get nervous, need a pep talk, or struggle with insecurities too!
BUT — like all successful humans, they’re following the age-old wisdom my mom (and maybe yours too?) shared before my first job interview:
“Dress up, talk big, act smart.”
That’s how I got the job and you can too! Fake it ‘til you make it, baby!!!
(I’m only kind of joking: fake it ‘til you make it is a real strategy that the best leaders use.)
A lot of what is perceived as “confidence” can be learned and deliberately cultivated.
I took an amazing executive presence workshop from Speakeasy almost 10 years ago and I still use the lessons today.
If you have a few thousand dollars laying around, do the workshop! It was game-changing.
If you don’t (and you missed Karen Houghton’s awesome Women + Tech session last month), here are my favorite tips on how to project confidence — regardless of how you feel inside.
I sound like your mom. BECAUSE SHE WAS RIGHT.
No one can see the thoughts in your brain. But they can see how you carry yourself.
Sit up straight in meetings, stand tall when you’re meeting people.
It’s not fair but there’s a bias towards tall people in business.
Good posture (and Zoom) close the gap!
Plus, standing up straight projects energy, makes it easier to speak clearly, and is good for core strength.
Boom! Snuck in a healthy habit. 😉
Guilty as charged. 🙋♀️
I bite my nails, twist in my chair, play with my hair, tap my foot, compulsively sip on tea, click my pen…allllll the things.
But if I am on stage or in an important meeting, I am still.
Movement makes you seem nervous.
Don’t believe me?
Record yourself sitting in a chair tapping your foot or flipping your hair. Say your company’s elevator pitch while doing it.
Same thing but sit still (with good posture!).
Which self appears more calm and confident?
This one feels SO AWKWARD but it projects tons of confidence when you see it on someone else.
I didn’t believe it until I saw a video recording of myself. Crossing arms looks afraid or small. Open arms exudes that confident boss energy!
When you sit at a conference table, don’t cross your arms on your chest or fold your hands in front of you.
Keep your arms open, forearms on the table, like you’re at a dinner party with a plate in front of you.
If you’ve ever taken professional headshots, they’ll say to put your hand in your pocket with a thumb out. The dumbest pose ever…THAT LOOKS AMAZING IN A PHOTO.
Same thing here.
Keep your arms open when on stage, talking at a party, or sitting in a chair.
Here’s an example from a fireside chat I moderated. I was nervous but good posture and open arms read as “relaxed.”
Especially if you’re going to be on stage, make sure your hair is pulled back in some way! (See photo above^^)
You don’t want your face shadowed or have it look like you’re hiding behind your hair.
Plus the audience is probably going to be at different angles around you, not only directly in front of you.
You want them to be able to see your face, expression, and mouth clearly.
I didn’t believe it until I saw it on video and then I started to notice it everywhere.
Look at the difference between Hair-Off-The-Face Adam Neumann and Flowy-Locks Adam Neumann.
Okay, he looks kind of a mess in both photos but the wild(er) hair is distracting. Get that man some product and a pony tail holder!
Dress in a way that makes you feel awesome. Think: comfortable, powerful, appropriate.
(I realize the irony of this with Adam Nuemann in a rainbow t-shirt right above. But look what happened to WeWork. Too many t-shirts!)
What you wear is another non-verbal way to project confidence and professionalism.
You can do this by wearing clothes that are appropriate for the setting and fit well. No fidgeting (#2) also applies to tugging on a skirt or fiddling with a watch or button!
If budget is tight, it’s hard to go wrong with a classic item like a black dress, white blouse and black pants, or button down and chinos.
Better to have 1 or 2 nice outfits worn over and over than let your clothes be a distraction or detractor. As long as the clothes are reasonable, no one will notice or care.
Personally, I’m not much of a fashionista (LOL, obvious if you know me) so I tend to follow a “minimum-viable-outfit” methodology. I’ve also gotten more casual over time.
When I was younger in my career, I dressed up more and followed principles like:
“Dress for the job you want not the job you have.”
“Dress up one degree more than the customer.”
”Dress professionally so you’ll be taken seriously.”
When I was in my 20s working with older execs, I selected outfits carefully.
Now that I’m a grizzled old tech veteran, I’m mostly jeans and sneakers.
Partly to show that I’m still cool (is it working?? 🤓) and partly because my knees are old and can’t handle heels (retracting that “still cool” statement…).
Don’t know what to wear?
Hire my stylist friend Liz (send me a note and I’ll connect you - she helped me dress after a pandemic + 2 babies), check out Fashivly, or wear a black turtleneck a la Steve Jobs and Elizabeth Holmes.
Seriously though, I dig “uniforms” and know many founders who have one.
If you’re into fashion, it’s a great tool for being memorable and making a statement. Leverage it!
I know a sales rep who deliberately wears colorful, eye-catching outfits at conferences (“Oh, you mean the woman in the bright blue dress?”) and founders who dress to match their brand colors.
Need inspo? Check out Tami McQueen and her amazing velvet suit or her orange suit with sneaks!
Smart people talk fast. So do nervous people. So do people who haven’t planned well and are rushing.
Talking slowly — again, somewhat counterintuitively — increases the perception of how confident you are.
At the very least, people are better able to understand and digest what you’re saying.
It also forces you to chose words carefully.
Have a timed pitch or short meeting window?
It’s 10x better to say less slowly, than to rush but “get it all in.”
Confidence is contagious. It’s a key ingredient to building a successful business.
You don’t need to feel confident every moment of the day (or even often) to be seen as a strong, capable leader.
Confidence — or the perception of it — can be cultivated.
Use these tips to project confidence even when you’re doing something new or feeling insecure!
Put your best foot forward and let the focus be where it belongs — on your vision and business. 🚀
What is your best tip for projecting confidence? Have you used one of these before? How did it work?
Assert yourself as a valuable and equal counterpart with these 3 strategies!
Read MoreHas this ever happened to you…?
You have a meeting set up with someone quite a bit older than you.
You’re in the same industry, maybe even the same role. Or maybe it’s a current customer or prospective client.
They might have more experience than you (see: older) but not always.
During the meeting, you listen and nod attentively.
It’s good manners, you don’t want to interrupt, people love an attentive listener, you want to make a positive impression.
It’s a little tiresome. They are droning on. Giving you advice you didn’t ask for. They interpret your polite question as encouragement and continue the soliloquy.
Meeting concludes and the power dynamic is established:
HOW DID THIS HAPPEN??
How can you be seen as a peer instead?
(Note: if you are looking for a mentor, great. But if you’re trying to network, earn business, or build credibility, this is terrible!)
I have had this experience many times over the years.
Being a young customer success manager with older clients, being a young startup leader with older F500 executives, being a young(ish) investor with older investors.
The mentor/mentee pattern didn’t seem to happen to my male counterparts though — even when meeting with someone older or more experienced.
What was going on??????
I paid attention to the differences in my interactions, when I felt a power differential most, and when I felt like I had earned respect as a peer regardless of age.
I FINALLY figured it out. It was within my control.
Here’s what I learned that changed how I showed up in the world:
To be seen as a peer, you must TREAT OTHERS AS A PEER.
How do you talk to someone who is your “equal” — a friend, a peer, a co-worker?
You banter back and forth, add your thoughts, and keep it casual yet respectful.
No fawning, polite listening, or catering to egos.
Peers do things like:
In the wise words of Shannan Monson, “I never fangirl.”
THIS is how you get taken seriously whether you’re a woman, young person, first-time founder, new-to-tech, or whatever characteristic makes you think you’re not on the same level as someone.
Assert yourself as a valuable and equal counterpart with these 3 strategies!
Absolutely the most important way to establish your credibility.
It sounds rude but DO NOT WAIT FOR AN OPENING IN THE CONVERSATION.
If you’re waiting for someone to ask you a question or get your thoughts, you might be waiting a long time. 😂
Especially if you’re a good listener.
Deliberately turn the conversation (monologue?) into a two-way street!
Chime in and add value:
Think about a conversation with a friend or colleague. You trade stories, build on points, go back and forth! Recreate this dynamic.
#PROTIP
Use improv comedy’s “Yes and” format!
“Yes, and that’s exactly what we’ve been hearing from customers. In fact, last week, one of the F500 companies we work with said, blah blah blah…”
“Yes, and the article from Wall Street Journal had additional data on that. Did you see their reporting on a 25% increase in seed funding in Q3?”
Never fangirl (or fanboy!) if you want to be seen as an equal.
And I say this as someone who is naturally overly enthusiastic!!!!!!!!!!!
Figure out how to be positive and be your best self without gushing.
I intentionally tone it down — especially in a first time meeting with someone established, senior in their role, etc.
(NOTE: This is wildly different than when I meet with founders where I’m trying to make everyone feel comfortable, relaxed, and open!)
#PROTIP
Language matters. Pick the words of a peer.
SAY THIS: “I’ve been looking forward to connecting.”
NOT THAT: “I’m so excited to meet you!!!!! It’s amazing that you did xyz and I love xyz. OMG!!!!!!”
SAY THIS: “Thanks for taking the time.”
NOT THAT: “Thank you soooo much for meeting with me. I know how busy you are!!! I really appreciate it.”
To be clear.
I’m not saying NEVER BE COMPLIMENTARY OR APPRECIATIVE.
But rather — understand how your language and actions will be perceived!
Adjust your language and actions to meet your goals.
If you meet Beyoncé, FANGIRL!!!!!!!!!
If you meet an investor, get them off that pedestal and treat them like a respected peer.
Asking questions is a great strategy, especially if you’re feeling unsure about the topic at hand.
With the right technique, you can do this as a peer rather than an uneducated newbie.
Think about how you’d ask a question to a co-worker or a friend. Casual, off-hand, with an “Oh hey — how did that thing go?” vibe.
Step one, channel that tone.
Step two, avoid disclaimers or qualifiers!
Would a peer say something like?
NO FREAKIN' WAY.
Plus — 99% of the time, you know more than you think.
STFU, Imposter Syndrome!!!!!!!
Ask the question straight up. Casual. No disclaimers.
For bonus credibility, include a lead-in that shows you know a thing or two.
#PROTIP
Here are examples of educated, peer-to-peer questions.
“How are you all thinking about <this trend, concept, challenge>?”
“I know a lot of companies are doing xyz right now. What’s your strategy?”
“We’re seeing xyz. What are you seeing on your end?”
“What did you think of <news event>?”
“What the backstory on that?”
“Oh, interesting. What do you think about xyz?”
It took me 15 years to figure this out.
(I love endurance events after all…😂)
You can do it WAY faster!
Share these credibility cheat codes with someone coming up in the world or keep them in mind for yourself.
Or send the tl;dr:
Never fangirl!
What helps you establish credibility quickly? What qualities stand out in a peer-to-peer interaction vs a big-dog-to-newbie one?
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